misc quotes

The deep, chaotic darkness, a swirling cauldron brewing, a place of mixing & waiting, the newness, life imbuing. Loving & forming, creating & molding, only the life to come knows what it's holding. So, in the dark I ponder, looking at external, internal skies, embracing the deepest lightless places for the forming away from eyes. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

She rises, walks slowly, deliberately to her place of power. She is an old Queen, a great dancer, a mature lover. Her arms & legs slowly rise into position as she begins to dance in a time finally for Kali, having danced on all her lovers or haters chests, to lick all the blood shed wantonly bringing the earth near to full death. Her dance moves deeper still into Durga to put all right that has not been right for long. She dances. She leads all to dance. She is India of fierce compassion & love. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

People are panicked, weeping, in shock, trying to flee from the danger of certain death as buildings explode, collapse. "Why do they hate us?" terrified people screech, grabbing children in an attempt to make them safe. Rescuers of all types help where they can & die, too. "Why do they hate us?" And, the world looks on, some grieved, some shocked, some approving, some with agendas & riches. And I will speak the name of your beautiful capital in near ruins in the destroyed ancient land between mighty rivers. I will sing it out loud as a prayer for healing. I will weep it out in the night spaces, brokenheartedly for you. I will whisper it in my sleep for your survival. Baghdad. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Special needs people are harmed &/or killed everyday, often with impunity. Not many ... not enough people care enough to demand we all take responsibility for us all. When the most vulnerable among us is safe, we can all be safe. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It is hard for me to recognize when someone is jealous of me even when it is pointed out later to me as "obvious." Maybe it's because I never can figure out why anyone would be jealous, esp. of me. But, I have heard this said to me from several persons in my past, usually just before those persons begin making life more difficult for me in some way: "Why does everyone / (names a specific person) love you?" ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Too often some proverb or saying that sounds like common sense is offered to a hurting person with the goal of shutting that hurting person up only. We are uncomfortable, angry, put out, or in some way reacting harshly to the hurting person for daring to hurt & not to leave the hurt in the past / forgive / move on / or whatever would make us feel better. We do not care what would make the hurting person feel better. We only care that that person shut up. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

We humans do not love, protect, treat kindly or with compassion, or take care of something we hate; therefore, think before speaking the falsehood "love the sinner but hate the sin." ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The 1st time I can remember seeing waterlilies was at Lawco Lake near my hometown. I was fascinated, of course. I also wondered how a non-fishy swimmer could not get tangled up under there - just in case I fell in the lake, you see. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It took actually seeing the graphic that pointed out that normally people do not deliberately destroy other people, esp. not those claimed to be loved, not long back to put it together in me that the destroying of me was what it was. I mean, I "knew" & have healed from so much, but to know deeply that there is no fantasy good person lurking behind what I had endured. There are very excellent qualities even in the worst monsters, I discovered. That is the true face of evil actually. Thankfully, I have been able to remain "Daphne" as a mostly loving female who continues to learn, to heal, to grow, & to do the best I can with what I have where I am despite all. One of these days, I might even "grow up." I somehow don't see this happening anytime soon though. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Big fluffy snowflakes fall steadily, continuing to cover the already whitened forest. Cold, slippery, so beautiful to see, a prayerful hope snow continues to fall & soak eventually the thirsty earth before spring. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I've been told it is not safe to be so quiet, so alone anywhere as a woman, or anywhere out in nature as any gender, but I roamed & sat quietly many a place. Was I always "safe?" No place is ever truly "safe" if that means free from potential harm. I did not take unnecessary risks, used whatever common sense & safety knowledge I had, & still went to have my times with nature just to try to find my sanity & peace in the midst of a life that was less than peaceful. Nature loved me back, mostly by ignoring me & just doing what it does around me. That meant the world to me. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I will wear a crown of flowers on my head & if not flowers then leaves; if not leaves then twigs; if not twigs then ice crystals; if not ice crystals then just me. My crown will show forth the joy of life & of love no matter. That's what crowns do. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Learning that wanting to discuss any topic, willing to chat, & being open for cyber sex means the same thing in this messed up world of FB. Silly me. I thought discussions are intellectual exercises of exchanging info, opinions, ideas, & enjoying someone's mind. I thought chatting meant talking on everyday topics - small talk, for example. Small talk & I have never really liked each other, but I have learned to semi-tolerate it for short periods of time. But, cyber sex is just EWWWWWWW, & those who demand it & get offended that I won't do it at all while also at my being offended that anyone dares demand it of me are just creeps EWWWWWWW. Like how mature & articulate I become on that one? It was better than graphically describing the urge to vomit. *shrugs* ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Maybe they feel overwhelmed, hurt, ill, confused, grieving, terrified, nervous, hungry, exhausted, etc. - all the things all of us feel in our seasons of life - & maybe they just "wants his/her mommy," to be comforted. We've all been there even though most of us won't show it to much of our world. Humans cry. We all need each other. The strongest among us esp. needs enormous support - so many needy folk will constantly try to drain the stronger ones dry. This world as it is run right now is rough on us all. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Fairly recently I was asked by someone extremely close to me whether or not I regretted having had a life? Wouldn't it have been better had I not been born or had died as I started to do in the process of being born? I answered well at the time, but the fact of being asked this haunts me as much as I would prefer to "consider the source" & process it until done. But since it is from someone I prefer to keep in my life even if in a limited way, the words echo & hurt because this is an established pattern of questions & challenges. Words & attitudes hurt & do destroy lives. These encounters remind me to keep checking my own output of my tongue & attitude because I do not want to hurt as I have been hurt. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I've been told that if someone knows your favorite books, favorite music, who you love, & where you live, then that person has a road map to your soul. I guess my soul needs a team of expert scouts then because even finding these pieces of info will not be easy nor a complete view of even a fraction of me. I believe it is true with all souls. But, in my case, I want to add the warning that there are no roads in my soul, so anyone selling road maps should be made to sell snake oil for oiling the snakes along the way, too. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It's true. We have our own music, our own song that continues throughout our life. Our soul dances. The deep silence inside is the acoustics & the dance floor. This is joy. This is peace. This love. This is Life. Our own part of the whole that we can hear if we are quieted to listen. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Each tiny piece of the puzzle, each thin strand in the cloth, each tip of color in the art is different from the rest even if similar. No one piece is universally interchangeable. No one part unneeded. Each fragile strand strengthens & beautifies the whole cloth. Each color reflects the fullness of art reflecting life. No one piece of the puzzle can demand all pieces be like that piece without destroying the whole puzzle. Life is wondrously diverse even when similar & just as wondrous when not. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

In my life I have broken hearts, hurt others' feelings, been totally oblivious & obtuse, been unreliable, forgotten important people/times/dates/things, said unkind or outright cruel things, etc., etc., etc. Many time I have done these things without being cognizant or fully cognizant of what I was doing. Sometimes it happened not due to my fault... or anyone's fault.... except that humans do not always mix well. When I have become aware of something I have done wrong & where I can do something to make it right without causing more harm, I have tried to do so. Many times I just have wept for being the deeply flawed human I am & determined to do better & better. Many time I have prayed for crop failures on the bad seeds in life sown in the hearts, minds, & lives of others - human & non-human. And, then I sigh deeply, pick myself up to try again to dance my dance & sing my song with more skill & grace. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The road calls to me from birth until my death, without map, compass, or clue but only the beckoning to follow to the end. And, I go although I often wonder why bother? Some say I chose to be born. Me, I'm not so sure. But, I'm here, & the road won't let me ignore it. And so I go. It is an interior journey no matter what the other roads I also am on bring. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

An ocean of oceans, an abyss so deep with icy volcanoes here & fiery ones there but dormant mostly, rumbling beneath the deep, dark, cold waters of my soul so hidden in the crushing destruction reflected in my silent, sad, watching eyes. Then alone, scared, scarred, but non-verbal grief poured in weeping so vast, a tsunami violently flooding from soles to tears; I was labeled insane, dangerous, a liar, game player even when silent. My eyes frighten humans, some non-humans too, but not waterways or trees, & so these were my friends. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Looking at the woman in the mirror smile with tiredness, almost weariness, except that certain twinkle in her eyes never fades. Music is felt rather than heard, a swirling of dancing, a laugh in her eyes. She only smiles; silent; her life speaks volumes but only to those with hearing hearts. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Of all our genders (female & male being the most common,) a study was somehow needed to prove we are all from earth & all human. Wow. Next study we need is to prove whether or not water is wet. *sighs* Can we all now learn to get along & maybe even become friends? Gosh, what a crazy bunch of concepts I have... I genuinely believe all of us can do it if we really wanted to try. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Let's dance this night of passion, an embrace of fire & love. Dance me to such shining ecstasy that even the stars sing out for joy. Dance me to the edge of madness & let me fall free, soaring on the waves of love to its end, & there die into you forever. Dance me. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

My dance is hot, & I am sexy. My art do I share. My life is my best art & most exhausting. But, I dance for the joy of living even a painful life for the vibrant, shining love that is my heart. My dance is a mystery to most, a deliberately misunderstood & hated thing to some, inspiration to many, & hope for a few. I am my dance. How can I be otherwise! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

When asked if I celebrate Valentine's Day, I said that I surely did because I was hoping to invest in a business that delivers a dozen long stemmed orgasms. I have longterm plans for owning the joint. First though, I have to find this elusive business. But, I'm hot on the trail! ;) ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A worker is worth his/her full wages, benefits, healthcare, safety, & dignity. To pay less than a full living wage with all of these things is to steal from the very people who create the wealth & truly take all the risks. A worker risks his/her life, health, family, sanity, & all he/she holds near & dear. An investor is a speculator who only risks money, which is often "pretend" wealth & the hubris of superiority. A fair model of shared benefits & risks would also include protections for the investors, of course, but without the over-protection of their owning their over-seers. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I used to dance with falling leaves or falling maple seeds, depending on the season. The neighbors never said anything to me about it, & I think they might have noticed. They noticed everything else. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The celebration of love, fertility, companionship, etc. I think would be better served by Imp Daphne Days which last yearlong year after year. But, someone has to sell all those almost puke-able valentine cards, eh? Meanwhile, I'll keep searching for how to set up my delivery of a dozen long stemmed orgasms business that sure to be an up & comer. Then I'll lobby for recognition of Imp Daphne Days. It's a whiz bang business model, I think. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Love can be dismissed & sent away, but it remains somewhere just as neither energy nor matter can be destroyed - only changed. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

And maybe once we've learned to dance with our "dark" sides, we can learn to dance with the whole spectrum of life. You may say I'm a dreamer... actually, I'm a dreamer but even more a dancer, a lover, & alive. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I admit it. I ate from the forbidden durian tree... or was it the forbidden grapefruit tree? It might have been the wild Appalachian paw paw even. Shoot. It might have even been the forbidden watermelon vine. Hey! I liked them all & like variety. So, I took my time. Are there any forbidden veggies I should start with next? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

misc quotes

I would love to be your rainbow on the rainy days of life. I would love to be your gentle breeze to cool the hottest days. I'd love to be your full moon up in the starry night. I'd love to be your happy thought in a myriad ways. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Small improvements daily or simply a lull between storms? I like to think it is the former but must prepare for the latter. No matter how many storms I have faced, each new one just feels draining. Why bother with it all anyone? Just give it up, & flow out with it all. Why? Working thru the storms of life is what I do... what I've always done. I know no other way. I know no storm-free life on this planet. So, ok, storm clouds, come on. As long as I still breathe, it's on! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Does the sun still shine? Oh, it's night? Then do the stars & the moon still shine? Well then, so will I. Oh, it is still day, you say. No matter, with all this shining about, I think I will just join in shining where I am too. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Strong but still cries, still hurts to stand in the face of attack or danger, still cringes & fears, but still does what must be done. It does not ever get easier because the heart must be guarded strictly lest hardness, bitterness, revenge, & abusiveness take root & poison, weaken, then kill the once strong. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Some days I just want to hang blankets & sheets up around me, pretend I am in some hidden safe place far away, curl up with my best buddy Luna dog, & dream of madcap adventures where no one hurts me & no one else gets hurt. I like to dream of taking all my most favorite people away with me, having a fantasy picnic of some kind, & just enjoying fun, friendship, laughter, music, & good stories long into the night around a bonfire, where everyone understood each other regardless of original language or customs & everyone wanted everyone else's comfort & pleasure ... then sleeping under a starry sky - on something supportive of backs & hips, of course. Hey! My fantasy, my terms & conditions, eh? Would you come along too? I'd like you to come as well. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Breathless, dizzy, skin on fire, every neuron firing, the heart races as black out nears. Only moments remain before the point of no return. Calm down! Spare a few seconds. Deliberately force the calmness. Sounds contradictory. It is, but it might save the life. The breathing slows. Exhaustion. A fall back onto oblivion. Another close call among how many. It can't go on much longer. There must be another way besides the permanent one. But for now, the sleep like the dead. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I heard my name & looked up. I was alone except for the dog & one of the cats. I was pretty sure neither of them could say my name. So, I dismissed it. But, I heard my name again. This time a cold touch walked up my exposed back. The dog was looking at me, beginning to whimper. Even the cat came near & cried. While petting them both, my name was spoken just in my ear. But, no one was there. So, I gathered the dog & cat to me & hid ourselves under that trusty safe place of all children... the blankets. I began singing every comforting song I had ever heard & partly remembered until all 3 of us were asleep. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Quietly I watched you for days, for weeks, for who knows how long. I would smile with my whole being to see you, but I was not ready to let you know I had even noticed you. You didn't seem ready to let me know you were also watching me. I might never be ready. You might not either. I might only want to enjoy watching a wonderful being & sending a blessing on the wind to you without you shying & running away. Maybe one day you will come nearer & allow me to pet you, to offer you food or water, or to become friends. Meanwhile run, jump, hide, then come back out & sing to the sun before sampling from the leftovers of the garden. I'll try my best to make sure there is always something there for you thru the winter. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I'm making my wishlist for Santa, it's true, & on the top of my wishlist are the best blessings for you. Then I impishly added with a smile & a wink: please let me meet them sooner than they might think. So, watch out, my friends, both near & quite far, I might be flying that sleigh right next to your star. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Big, fluffy, feathery flakes lazily fall, & then the wind whips them into a whirling dance of chilling delight. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Feeling the vibe in my hips, my womb, my legs quiver with the excess energy as my body heats up, my eyes become more focused, my movements more feline, somehow more female. Wanting nothing & no one between me & my chosen target, I smile, a predator's knowing, sensing. I will take all the time I need. This one is mine. I will get this. Quietly gathering resources & preparing my strategies. Oh yes, purring right now helps before stealth mode is on. Watching. Waiting. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Shall I tell you the secrets of my heart & mind? But, I already have. I have hidden nothing. Even all my closeted skeletons I made to put on costumes, get out of the closet, & perform song & dance numbers. It's all here. But, putting together the pieces? Ah, well, where would be the fun if I did that work as well. But, the clues are all there somewhere too. Happy hunting. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Looking deep into the Vastness, the Mystery, the All That Is, I see deep chaotic darkness with brilliant spots of light. I see the breath, the energy of Life, pulsing everywhere in a musical majesty of spheres, of vectors, shapes, & potential shapes. The vibrancy felt in & around me, dancing within & without me. All Alive. All responsive. All connected as one living being within a living being within a living being within a living being. I am in silent wonder that begs to sing out with joy, to whirl in ecstasy, grateful to be a part of this breath. To life! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

If ever you want to send me a gift but cannot think of what I'd like, please just send you. Gift wrapping or ribbons not required. Chocolate is a bonus but also not required. You are perfect. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The wind brings a tingling chill to the bones that cause my heart to jump & my joints to protest, but my heart always wins. I like it cold out so that cuddling becomes more fun. I giggle inside to think you cannot leave easily now because you hate the cold, & I am a furnace of red hot mama. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Sometimes grumpiness, crankiness, & bitchiness wrap their arms around me until I cry from the internal pressures. I never like being this way or to cry because I seem unable to do it without my usual enthusiastic fullness, hurting me in all of my being & hurting those closest to me as well. Then I want to forget I even exist, feeling it is not worth it to keep trying anymore. It's a bad attitude born of pain extended in too long a company. I keep working on me, reminding myself that although I do not see much progress in me, others might see it instead. So, I keep trying after my stormy times, but sometimes it is in between naps & breaks. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

As a child, I used to lie under the water maple to watch the winged seeds fly down like small maple-y heliocopters. I wanted to plant them all to grow whole forests of water maples... just next to the whole forests of chestnuts & elm trees I thought were so beautiful. But, the elms disappeared, & someone chopped down all those beautiful chestnuts. Only the one water maple remains, & it is a dear friend from my youngest days... & so missed. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Her body rigid, face impassive, only the streaming tears down the sides of her face revealed the tormenting storms inside, she looked ahead, unfocused, silent. I offered tea & freshly baked scones silently, listening with my whole being to all she screamed in silence. "All the pretty songbirds," she muttered with a heavy sigh, eyes now down-turned, as she returned to frozen silence on the surface. "Are beautiful, yes, but so is crow... a powerful magical bird," I said quietly, then also returning back to silent offers of more tea & all my heart. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I fell for you truly, deeply, headlong despite my caution, despite all my reasoning. I didn't want to love. I had come to a place of despair & simply wanted to finish my death process begun from birth. Or so I thought. But, my inner me ambushed me, kidnapped me, stole my eyes & my heart, & would give me no peace at all until "dammitall!" I had to pay attention to the telltale sign of renewed Life, Love, Laughter, & that effervescent bubbling that gurgles all thru me, over me, & splashes out over everyone around. Why did everyone else know I loved but me? Oh yeah, because I was being grumpy about having to admit to being willing to do the hard work of healing & the even scarier work of loving & being loved. But even in this my inner me seduced me & revealed me for being such a liar. I really secretly wanted this deliciousness even if I could not bring my grumpy self to admit that. Oh but gawd! I wanted it more than a dehydrated person in the summer desert wanted water. Give me more! More! MORE! I want it ALL. I hate when I seduce myself, but here we go for one more round despite my being a terrible liar. I thrill when I seduce me. I'll never quit. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Why should your being a  butterfly & my being a dragon keep us from loving each other & being friends? Just stay out of the line of my fire breath in case I sneeze & we should be just fine. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A victim being told to be quiet, to go away, to forget & let it go, to stop whining, to stop exaggerating, to be strong, to be a winner not a quitter, to keep the chin up, & above all to preserve the right of those who benefit from the silence to continue living their comfortable lives of having permanently harmed & endangered an innocent(s) without penalty to the party(ies) responsible but borne a whole lifetime by the innocent(s) might be the way of the world, but it is evil & has numbered days. Nothing like this ever lasts forever despite seeming like it does. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I share little pieces of my heart & soul showered here & there, opening myself like a wild flower swaying in the windy crevice, not easily spotted or perhaps more easily ignored but once finally seen, difficult to look away. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Smiling fondly, wistfully, a sigh, & a bit of a sob on the breathing, I dream longingly of holding you forever within a more perfected woman than the broken one I am, but perhaps the brokenness allows more entrances & accesses while allowing the softness & light within a venue to you. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

12/12/12 12/21/12 & the moon is in the 7th house, & Jupiter aligns with Mars, & fly me to the moon already! I want to play among the stars, esp. the ones that fall down from the sky everytime you walk by. You see, just like me, they long to be close to you. So, come a little bit closer, you're my kind of man. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

For me, I am no longer a victim nor even a mere survivor. I am a thriver, a flourisher, a creative living artist, a soul dancer, an impish mind puzzler, an ever-heart-expanding lover of life, & a woman. What about you? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

To be confident in one's own skin is our birthright that has been stolen, destroyed, used, abused.... BUT, we can say "enough already! I will be me, as I am, in the body I live in right now, & I am enough as I am." Yes, we can work on learning something new everyday. We can grow, change, whatever we determine we want/need. But, that does not change the fact that right now, this ever-present "now moment" is all we have. We are not promised a second more. So, we are good enough & beautiful right now. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Never forget that I am an impish dragon-ish person who just also happens to tend to be sweet, kind, giving, gentle, & of longer than most patience in many things. The rapier wit is as sharp as any fang or claw. And, I have earned various nicknames such as "the Matriarch of Volcano Deities" for a reason. Defensive actions can be swift & unseen by the oblivious in coming... all on my call. Consider this an unusually compassionate, friendly warning. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

To me, for a religious or a spiritual person to say that it is even possible to "forget" god or that god is "not allowed"  somewhere/anywhere is the equivalent of saying to a fish that fish have forgotten water or not allowed water into schools of fish. Not possible.

Even further, for a religious/spiritual person to blame violent tragedies (or even natural disasters) on god because god was "left out of somewhere" are showing proof of lack of understanding of most of life & are slandering/libeling the god in whom the person(s) supposedly believe. The evil in the hearts of our fellow humans is more than enough to do all this cruelty... with or without prayer mandated in public places. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

In my lifetime, several dog species were targeted in the same way pit bulls are now. Among them are boxers, Doberman pinchers, German shepherds, huskies, Rottweilers, & bulldogs. None of them are the terrors they were made out to be, nor are pit bulls. It has a lot to do with the humans in the lives of the dogs & not the dogs themselves. Plus, no 2 dogs are alike - same as no 2 humans are alike... we are all unique unto ourselves even when similar. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

No one is more expert about one's own life & experience than the person him/herself. If you want to know what it means, feels like, daily experiences, etc. for someone who is autistic, please ask the person. Do NOT assume you know even if you are a parent of an autistic child, a highly trained/awarded psychologist with autistic clients, a neurologist, or anyone other than the person him/herself. AND, each person is unique, so don't assume from one's answers that you know all others'. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I have known many who are severely mentally ill, & of those, very, very few would I actively fear for my life at any time. Very few indeed.

I have known many who are by all measures most of our world would label as highly successful that I would not trust to be near long for the knowing my life could easily be endangered at any time. Then there are the rest of us. It is wise to be aware of your surroundings no matter what. Do the best you can & then stop worrying so much. Life is full of many things... most are to be enjoyed. This includes other people whether we know them or not yet. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

misc quotes

Yes, I am very sexy. I am one of the last of the red hot mamas. Most people all my life have tried to tell me how unlovable, how ugly, how etc. I am, & the pity of it is that for most of my life I mostly believed them. BUT, now I know that that is not the truth about me... never has been. No matter what my size, my health status, my age, my anything that can be quantified or even talked about by anyone, I am Daphne. I am a sexual & very sexy woman... even during the many years in my lifetime that I have been outwardly "celibate." AND, I'm getting hotter all the time, dancing as I go. Come dance with me, & celebrate life, love, & joy too. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Any season that has creative imagination involved has magic to transform hearts, minds, & lives. Luckily, all seasons have this. Some just need extra care to bring out the magic more or to tame the competing energies bent on warping the magic & wonder. I like both because chaos is a wonderfully fertile bed to plant new life to develop from. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

This is wisdom - to guard our own hearts & minds against self-importance, which is self-righteousness, arrogance, pride, & a bunch of nasty attitudes that tangle us up into bigger messes & evils we blindly "never expected" from ourselves. I look for tell-tale signs in me of becoming indignant, outraged, hurt/upset about "being misunderstood" or "ignored," or even becoming to "humble" It is one thing to have healthy, working boundaries & self-respect and another to be self-important. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

There is always something about the way an opinion is presented that helps my allowing even obnoxious ones (to me) to be heard, listen to, & at least an to make the attempt to understand. If even an "acceptable" opinion is delivered from haughty arrogance & self-righteousness, my refusal to accept soars higher than eagles. That will, actually, cause me to re-think the "acceptable" opinion to see if I need to change my mind about it. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

the honest cries of a broken heart, the true penitent, the one who becomes flexible, agile, malleable, moldable, & ultimately strong, authentic... learns compassion... it is the only way to learn it as it cannot be taught - only lived ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The sun now begins to climb higher above the horizon after standing still after the winter solstice. Days in the northern hemisphere will grow slowly & steadily longer as the cycle of life continues onward. May all those you love be held dear & told often of your love. None of us are promised another turn around the sun, so love deeply, thoroughly, & with untamed joyful enthusiasm. May you know deep & abiding peace of heart & mind, a true gladness of outlook, & an attitude of living love in all its wondrous splendors. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

One of the most frightening of all the many frightening words is the word inoperable. More scary words include "there's nothing more we can do." For those who are helping & caretaking, God bless you. If ever I could truly have a magic wand to make things better, this would be one of those times I would like to choose. All I have to offer, though, is my love, what prayerful energies as are here to me, & the hugging by my heart from one who does care deeply. *hug* ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

And so the government wants to tap our phones, record our conversations in public places (like on the bus, the train, etc.,) read our emails, & whatever other mischief of noisiness that can be imagined. Unless the drone assigned to monitor me is mechanical only & only visits my FB wall, I fear I am not doing my duty to keep the drone fully employed since I spend most of my time in silent thought... except when singing - either solo or in harmony with the dog and/or the cat. Since I have been mostly quiet for 5 decades now (ask my former classmates on here to verify my tendency to be quiet LOL,) I doubt I will find it in me to become extremely talkative too soon. Now if they ever discover how to tap my thinking, they'd best be about it soon before I forget how. hehehe ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It was asked - "If you could kiss anyone, famous or not, under the mistletoe this season, who would it be?" Hmm... my answer did not seem to be the one expected - Luna dog kisses me everyday, esp. when we sing her favorite song at the moment which is Lou Rawls "You'll Never Find Another Love Like Mine." What?! ;) hehehe ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Well, all right-y then. I was asked if I had a New Year's resolution, which is a tradition I have not taken up these past 5+ decades, but who's counting, right? I resolve to continue trying my best to keep breathing as long as possible because I am very addicted to oxygen & not ready to give up this habit just yet. End of list... all other efforts this coming year are purely bonus points. :D ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Many a seemingly wise statement can be deceptively cruel & soul destroying as well as untrue. Even a statement that seems compassionate at one time turns out to be evil at another. Learning how to know the differences & the timing takes practice, training, more practice, an open mind, more practice, & even more practice. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Re-wiring ourselves is possible, difficult yes, improbable? hmm depends, but possible. That was all I needed to hear. You see, I started my work on re-wiring me decades ago, but I had no idea until fairly recently that this was what I was indeed doing. My internal compass, inner radar, my vision... all were strong albeit mostly a mystery to the mind or explanation. But, I knew I had to keep going... just do the next thing that came to do or wait until it came. 5+ decades later, I am still here, still breathing, & still re-wiring me. I used to think it would be so much easier if those with the equipment & skills would only just help me, but I now wonder if that would have been my demise instead. I am blessed to have been protected on this path of mine. And so it goes... onward. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I have seen large bodies of water, even flowing water freeze. I have even seen people drive out onto a frozen river. Me... I prefer my explorations on frozen emotions, frozen ideas, frozen beings... esp. mine... in order to warm them, unfreeze them, & improve circulation. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

May I be forever kissed with a million million kisses of every sort & from my lips flow the joys & blessings of life lived fully, zestfully, juicily, vibrantly, & completely in joyful blessings. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

"So, you have wanted to learn more about being Torah-true. What have you learned so far?" he asked.

"Breath is life. Breath is what determines if life exists... in these texts as well as in current medical science. A baby's 1st independent breath is considered birth into a living individual. In a surgery, the breath is paramount in importance & must be stabilized before all other procedures or concurrent with immediate emergency such as bleeding out. Bleeding out is so dangerous because all the breath/conduit for breath leaves the body," she replied. "So, God makes human and other bodies out of earth & breathes life into them... each unto his/her own kind (still lobbying for a neutral, non-gendered pronoun in English, alas.) Life is the hallmark/thumbprint/artist signature of God. And the whole Earth is alive/breathes. Ditto the whole universe. To Life!"

"You listen & learn well," he smiled. "Please tell me what you meant by 'The Mystery' earlier."

"God, in short. More specifically, when I ponder The All That Is = the Vastness = the Mystery.... I see an ever expanding universe full of music, vibrations, breath, Life... & know that because the whole is alive it is responsive & also contemplate that there might be multiverses & other unknowables even just on the "physical" scale of things... then realize the less physical but mysterious side of things.... and then on top of all that realize god is a part of all that is & is bigger than the biggest big & smaller than the smallest small & still encompasses all.... & then add in that being a part of a body/living being - as is our world/our universe, we cannot comprehend or fully know the whole but still want to... god will remain the mystery... a loved & loving one, awe-inspiring & even more than a bit frightening... but good.... = The Mystery to me."

"Ah, moving into quantum-reality and such. May I poke Schrödinger's Cat for you?" he chuckled.

"Please," she also laughed.

~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

We need to watch the targeting of dissent, the anxiety of free speech, the obsession with consensus, sensationalism to whip up public fear/terror, vigilante mentality & actions, & labeling "others" as "different" & therefore dangerous before even listening or knowing the facts. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Being a large woman, I have a large canvas with which to work with & to display. Sure it also means I will have enormous haters, detractors, evil eyes & tongues everywhere I am. So, I'll make myself as colorful, as joyful, as open, & as expressive as I can as any time I choose. Just watch me dance thru the fires & storms. You might consider joining me. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A precocious 3 year old girl atop a stack of big books on a chair before the huge dictionary that's chained to the table cries as she tries to figure out the scribbles inside. The librarian finally sees her & asks what is wrong instead of just scolding the child for her dangerous perching on books. The librarian knows this is a very young reader & something is very wrong.

"I have to know what an evil bitch & whore means," the toddler silently cries.

The librarian is stunned but asks ever so gently, "Why, sweetheart? Where did you hear these words?"

"Because that is what I am, & I want to stop so they won't hurt me anymore."

Before there could be more, the child is whisked away & in so much more trouble than she can understand... & she cannot find how to stop being that thing she can no longer say for several decades into her future. Some lessons get beaten in well. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

What I find is once a man begins to explore the fuller aspects & nuances of his own sexuality, he risks being misconstrued or abused. A woman wanting to explore men's sexuality will face a lack of quality info & also risk danger from a world than hates women's full expression of authentic sexuality. And yet, true intimacy, love, & great sex all depend on us all asking, exploring, knowing, learning, growing, sharing... which we as humans need, want, desire, crave, shrivel for lack of... We want love, real love, but are afraid of being real or loving in the vulnerable places... the very places that are the most honest us & also the most beautiful, if only we can allow ourselves to get beyond our fears, our wrong learnings, our wounds. Love & Life are intimate dancers. Oh, to dance always! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw  

All of us have good, bad, & evil in us. All of us are capable of all of which humans are capable. Thankfully, most of us will not be given the opportunity to face our more extreme evil in action, but we catch glimpses of it sometimes in the flaring of a temper, fantasy thoughts of revenge - including our religious thoughts of eternal revenge & sadism to all not like us, the grumpiness snapped at a loved one, the rejection of helping a loved one in abused danger by willful blindness, & a million other small, banal evils we refuse to look at or identify as really evil. We want to believe we are good even when we do, say, or think wrong things because it hurts to identify & name what we prefer to call our flaws, our shadows, our darker sides, or, more typically, a simple human mistake or weakness. None of are perfect, we plea & demand. Evil cannot be me or us. It must be "the stranger" or "the devil." ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

As we take responsibility for our own actions, words, thoughts, & the consequences of that responsibility, we grow & experience real liberty. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

When I was still a teenager, I wanted to discover what was real as far as beliefs were concerned. My criterion from that time on was that if it did not work for someone who was quadriplegic, disabled from a stroke, nonverbal or mostly nonverbal, & mostly alone, then it did not truly work for anyone. My second criterion was that it still had to be recognizable even if the belief was not presented in the way the vast majority of humans were comfortable with or were expecting. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Some of the hardest lessons for me in life have been learning the many facets of self-respect &, a by-product of such learning, showing due respect. Making healthy boundaries, learning I did not have to explain those boundaries or my enforcing them, & a myriad related issues continue to be a high priority learning for me even 5+ decades into my life. Everyday I learn, I grow, I get stronger, & I am closer to real freedom & real liberty and not just the appearance of it. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

If only we humans can finally get over ourselves, calm down, & learn to see other humans as humans, just humans, we'll gain so much from each other while also helping each other be safer, better able to meet life's demands, & have so many more friends. It's just us here - humans, & we're in this together. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Boys / men should be insulted with the "boys will be boys" excusing of bad guy behaviors, rules, words, jokes, etc. because it means we, as a world, do not expect boys / men to be or act like more than mere brutes & mindless erections with absolutely no control over themselves. I have much better faith in boys / men than that, & I do believe the majority of males are a lot better than this. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Kiss me with your lips, your fingertips, your eyes in softly sung purrs of delight everywhere, & let me do the same. Leave no part inward or outward unexplored. Take me as I enfold you into me & show you a woman's love in the way that only this woman can. Show me the love only you know how to give. Let us write fire in our breath, tingling in our touch, & home in our eyes. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw