misc. quotes

You're not like us. You're different. Your way is wrong. Only our way is right. You deserve to be tortured with glee, suffer untold agonies forever, and remain ever forsaken. And I say this with love. We are a peaceful and loving people. ENOUGH. My head will explode with the enormity of the sanctimonious, self-righteous hypocrisies of our species. How many times I want to resign from this species!

Those drops of waters in all the oceans could have been dropped from my tears. The eruptions of all volcanoes could have come from my exasperation with it all. How hard is it to understand anyway that another life is life just as our own? How hard to accept another human is as human as we are? How difficult is it to grasp that understanding one another might take time and effort but is worth every bit of it? Peace is not gained thru war. Love is not shown thru hatred. Good grief! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It is important for us to remember that spitefulness and jealousy are poisonous roots to harbor in our hearts and minds. Other roots lending toward speaking badly about another in his/her absence (or even presence) are bitterness, feelings of inferiority or superiority, hatreds, fears, and other very human weaknesses. Therefore, it is imperative we look first to our own hearts and minds to cleanse ourselves because whatever we dwell on in our mind or heart will overflow into our speech and actions. Once a word is uttered or a deed done, it cannot be undone, and much damage can and usually does occur.. both to the victim of the back-biting and the hearers but even more so to the one who back-bites. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

As the autumnal equinox is about to come & the fall season officially begins, I think of what I love so much about the season to come. Cornstalks, pumpkins, apples, and a whole cornucopia of harvest comes in. I remember putting food by with mom, grandmothers, and older aunties, loving the process a much as the nip in the air. Seeing the fall colors everywhere as whole hillsides turned into magical, colorful carpets. The darker days, the chillier times with snow not so far away, the many seasonal shows from Charlie Brown to Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, holidays full of fun and surprises, and seeing people again that had been missing perhaps for a year or months. Each day brings more bundling up and cuddling up, perfect for storytelling or bonfires and also for my now aging lungs, easier breathing in some ways. Come, dark, colder season. Who will give birth to the baby who will play the Christ child in the pageants? Who will dress up as a scary monster on Halloween then dress as Santa for Yule? I await my dance with the holly king and maybe a sip of wassail this year. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The leaves turned, twisting in colors glorious. Seeds fell to be covered thru the coming winter to show up as seedlings in spring. But for now, I dance in the colding air, nose nipped with frosts, freezes now & then but coming more often. Rain dancing with me among the many colored fall hills where the crows caw homecoming time. The pumpkin is huge but sometimes dances too. We dance harvest home. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Screams loud but loud still the black & blue marks on her face, her body. Anger even fades from eyes. A hopelessness of living though dead comes instead. It's that stillness of no more tears. A terrible storm brews so deep beneath the surface only one truly knowing this territory would see it. But, it is there. A horrible vengeance of wrath if not healed. A horrible wrath of vengeance despite healing. The damage goes beyond life deep. An unbroken chain of lifetimes of terror in flesh. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The cold rain mixes with snow & sleet in a slow steady drizzle with the occasional gust that promises more to come. Earthquakes nearby a few days earlier forebode the coming of stronger elements to come as mother earth shakes herself, attempting to re-stabilize & re-balance. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The winds, the winds, the winds, blowing as if imported from a typhoon with a tropical monsoon along for the ride. Surf's up! What? But these are the mountains, hundreds of miles from the nearest seaside. We'll be ok if the power holds. Then the ice came with snow. OK, now this is more like what we usually deal with... if only the power holds. It used to be even the power was not all that big a deal to getting by ok. That was before getting too old, too unhealthy, or needing critical care. But, my! It is a pretty sight as long as everyone is ok... or as ok as possible under the circumstances. And, if the power holds. It snows, snows, some windy snow here and there, but mostly snow. Good curl up with a book & a dog weather now. Or sleep. Or both. Snowing. Snowing. Power please hold. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Sparrows flying to the window during a calmer time in the wind & snow, seeking to build winter shelter with me, decide it is not enough protection. Off they go to the eaves to inspect accommodations there. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Most of us are intolerant (bigots) in some or many ways, unwilling & even defiantly opposed to learning about "the other" - even among those of us committed to learning to live peacefully & compassionately. Hate seems so easy, inbred. To check ourselves out, think of what we consider immoral then ask if we would tolerate this in our neighbor or our grown children if all else is reasonably responsible? Would the addition to the neighborhood of our place of worship or of our favorite place for hanging out of a group we pretend to tolerate cause us pain or anger? Do we ask for others to not judge us but to understand & be tolerant while we are unwilling to extend that same measure elsewhere? If we cannot answer with graciousness, patience, & wanting to understand more, then we have learned of places still needing our work within ourselves before allowing ourselves even to begin to consider to judge "the other." ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Thoughts running too rapidly to follow, too alert, strained, must need to understand, to find a way. Searching, searching, sifting, re-thinking, trying to find all the pieces to this puzzle. Remembering each word, each movement, each tone, everything. Wanting desperately to know enough in time to make the right decision, & time is drawing near. So... Sleep. Go play & be silly. Let this puzzle percolate a bit inside. The way will become clear. Relax. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

When asked by a young person what was the best way to get guys' attention, I said "it helps to be breathing." It was not what she wanted, I think. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Fog envelops the mountain, making the trees look like cast members in a romantic, mysterious play that draws my dreaming soul to wander away from overwhelming troubles for awhile to let the calm of the forest soothe my battered places & strengthen my resources to do whatever I must do. Deep breath. Set my face forward. Dry my tears despite all. Chin up. Forward unto whatever is calling me now. Because of the mountain, I can & will go on with a smile, then a laugh, & then a song with a dance... even if it is only in my heart & soul. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Patient waiting while doing all that is known to be done for now, keeping strength girdled round about me to freeze into the holding formation needed, freezing out panic even as more piles on me, I wait hopefully, expectantly. Told I'm in denial too many times to count. Told I need to give up even more often. Told I do not count, so don't get my hopes up. Yeah. Whatever. I wait. Weary sometimes. I wait. I know nothing lasts forever in my life. I also  know winter does come to an end. Crocuses do pop up thru the ice & snow. I wait. I sense crocus blooms in my future still. These are worth waiting for, I am convinced. I smile, & I wait. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The touch of fog lingers lazily in the tops of the trees on the mountain this morning as the cold seeps into the earth despite a bit of warming expected later today. Winter comes. I'm ready to hibernate, to hide, to rest, to heal, to sleep, but not sure if these will be allowed. Winter travel or work is just as dangerous as summer travel or work. But, if I must, then a frozen me will do what I must. Besides, I look good in icy colors with a touch of holly in my hair. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

None of us. No, not one of us. None means none. None of us has all the answers to much of anything. It is arrogance at its haughty-ist, supremacist, most bigoted worst to think any one of us is better than or has the only answer over any other of us. As long as any of us believe this way, none of us are safe. All must be prepared to protect ourselves & our loved ones from enemies within ourselves and from those around us. To change the world, to have real peace for ALL... we must face ourselves & change our own hearts, minds, & actions. All of us. Until then, let's all keep working toward a more peaceful & compassionate world. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Receiving loving touches of so many kinds from you all & from ... oh my! from everywhere! ... has given me strength to keep breathing & imp-ing until now. I have no doubt this love will give the thermals beneath my wings to fly forever. AND, I want to take you with me. Love would be lacking & incomplete without you. Let's fly together please. Dance on the wind. Love forever. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A misty, cool day brings out the romantic dreamer in me. Today is such a day, & I dream of you, my beloved. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I have had a type of solitary confinement for so many years that it has become my normal home base. Solitude & quiet have given me treasures I doubt I could have any other way. It truly is all about attitude & the use of creative imagination. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It is very important to make sure we keep ourselves honest with ourselves so that we do not just hear the things that comfort & validate our opinions only. We need a wide variety of sources to listen to & the courage to ask intelligent, good questions of each & every one. Check. Reference. Think. Ask more questions. Keep learning. Keep stretching. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The cold nipped me as I sat enjoying the chilled scene freshly dusted in lacy white. The dark bark of the trees, darker than in their leaved days, interlaced branches, holding hands as an arch in the sky. In my heart I just knew as long as the trees were there, my world was going to be fine no matter what came. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The children scream, shaking, even though the siege is all they've ever known, cruelty a fact of daily life, want, hunger, more sleepless nights to the demonic music of bombs. Moments of joy stolen here & there in between losing a friend, a mother, your limbs. Survival? Comforting with assurances of afterlife. But nobody really knows. But please do not take that hope away from trapped people unless you can offer better. End the war. Living as humans together cannot be that difficult if we all try, surely! Another bomb. No one wants to try. Bomb away. Bomb us all. Bomb until nothing at all is left. Then? Then what? Then WHAT? Bomb away. It does not matter. We only lose something priceless. No biggie, right? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Being so deeply blessed beyond comprehension, it is hard to believe anymore the cacophony telling me I am ugly, worthless, & to be eradicated from the face of the earth because of my looks, my size, or my gender. How can real breath be anything but beautiful? My beauty is part of the whole starry sky and mossy earth. ~ Daphne Yvonne  Bradshaw

Rarely do we even think about much less make the effort to listen to our self-talk that goes on well beneath the surface of our thoughts, but it there directing us all the time. It is hard work to change root things in our life, but it is impossible to change what we do not see, will not name, cannot own as a part of ourselves, and do not believe as important. But, the effort is vital to our living authentic lives. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Warmer but chilly day for late November has all the forest critters quickly gathering last minute needs for the coming winter while I smile before the open window watching, listening, wondering if a true winter is coming this year. It is hard to tell anymore. Everything changes more than usual. But still, life goes on on the mountain with that certain mountaineer attitude. Mountain right. Here we stand or sit. We are the mountain. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

misc quotes

Shooting stars, my wish tonight

For the wrongs to be put right;

For us to learn to love each other

More than love of sister & brother,

A love of ALL, not one excepted,

But goodwill & peace, ALL accepted.

~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It seems the naughty bench was not the place to go to be naughty. Who knew? *halo* ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Sleep? Isn't that what you do when FB shuts down for the night? Oh, FB doesn't shut down for the night? So, what's this sleep thing again? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

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This strength, this courage to face life just as it is, & much more left unspoken in the hidden hearts of those who suffer such judgments of unworthiness which run a wide spectrum of the shunned, the misunderstood, those held with impatient contempt barely concealed or not even attempted to be concealed, the unloved, neglected, murdered by callous busyness... are the faces etched with pain & holding sad eyes of those living all around us if we but only looked with kindness & love. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw  

Bencinya hati ini tapi aku rindu. (I hate you, but I miss/love you.) Words to a favorite song echo. The wounded heart, craving yet hating the affections of poison: A longing as deep as the knowing such as the moth has for the flame or the bird for the thorn, & just as urgent, just as deadly. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

With tears streaming down her cheeks, she wailed, “I should see these things coming somehow I tell myself. I never do though. And, I cry. It hurts like hell. And, I hate to cry. Sometimes I think ‘how can I be so horrible that people who get close to me or are related to me cannot stand me or be kind to me’? You say it is never about me but about them... but I am the one crying.” ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

My friend Fawad Fiaz - "The only way to truly know a person is to argue with them. For when they argue in full swing, then they reveal their true character."

I wish to add that anytime you encounter another person when the emotional side has higher sway with less self-censorship (such as during orgasm, giggly type of joy, deep sadness, weeping, terror, hunger/thirst, ill, in pain, etc.,) you see more & more of the true character. A lifetime of learning these things of just ourselves much less another being is only the beginning. AND, by Fawad's statement - I have a very long way with much hard work to go if I hope to have/be the kind of character I long to have/be. I am definitely a work in progress. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

There's more than a hole in this bucket, dear Liza. This bucket ain't got no bottom! This bucket is the need for love, belonging, kindness, healing, wholeness... esp. in the brokenhearted, the scarred by life's darksides. It is said the teacher teaches what the teacher most needs to learn. May I ever continue to learn to be kinder, more loving, gentler, & full of fairy dust. May I continue to dance even in the darkest times... esp. in the darkest times. Dance with me please. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I died, but somehow this shell of me trudged on for years, decades. Something fiercely defied my death, would burn my inward parts, never resting, singing sometimes raucously as I, shattering, was trampled, tamped down. Taunting me to dance ever more on puppet strings, the eyes, the mocking mirth of minions of my demise, defying them all. I did dance, a macabre dance of joy, of love, of kindness, of hope in darkest dark of no light but the longing knowing of the fierceness of my heart. My dance. My way. Even climbing the puppet strings to braid them to me. I dance. I dance. Burning, I dance. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Sitting on my favorite rock overhanging the creek, leg dangling, feet splashing, the wind dancing with the light & the trees, my crying slowed finally to that calm peacefulness after a brutal storm of emotions. The hills, the forest, the creek, the stone comforted me. As long as they remained, I'd never be truly alone. Here I belonged. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

And so I reveal piece by piece my soul, spread out before eyes that can see, words & music, art & puzzle, covered with my blood, my tears, my smiles, my laugh... seemingly locked within undisclosed. No, not hidden if you know where to look & what to look for, but I will not solve the puzzle for you for I am too busy being it. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Don't you understand that I long to kiss you with my whole being, to taste even your most hidden parts & bring them out to be kissed evermore in the light of my love? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Silken skin of palest cream, darkest brown hair now mostly snowy white sparkling with the electricity of the lightning storm, the shadows play, flirting, darting with the flashing. Eyes glow then are hidden in the dark. Moaning softly, almost singing, beckoning like a siren call of heat, the draped sheet slowly glides to the floor. A storm symphony of heat, desire. Come, my love, ride the wind if you dare. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Have you ever struggled to remember the good side of yourself? All the monsters come out to play. Have ever all the wicked misdeeds & thoughts attacked your mind & heart? Even to remember the smallest kindness, an act of love you've sown lies blank before your eyes? Me too. Then I remember I have never done anything perfectly, so even at wickedness I slip up & be good. It spoils the whole me as monster motif somehow as I burst out laughing with tears. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Tree, do you ever wonder things like why continuing living since you must live only here for 100s of years despite all done to you or around you? What have you seen, heard, thought in your tree life here? Can you teach me please, Tree? I need your wisdom. Tree? Thank you for continuing to live here & letting me live near you. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I did not know there was any other way, only that it had to be done. I did not know it was impossible, so I just did it. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

My heart grows stronger when my focus is on my happy thoughts rather than giving in to the surrounding turmoils only. Where my heart focuses is indeed my treasure, & I want more. No! I want it all! I want joy overflowing & love upspringing. I want look death in the face & say one more time - "Not yet, old friend. Not yet." ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I've asked this question of myself quite often through my life as a good checkpoint, inspired by a preacher's sermon about the Good Samaritan: would I recognize what I say I believe if it showed up in a different way from what I would ordinarily expect? I know we all tend to seeing only what we want or expect to see. It takes a lot of training to see more.

I want more. I want to see as much as I can. I want to understand even if that understanding burns me. I want to love and to live as fully and as deeply as is possible in this broken woman's body. I want to be me in all the many facets and ways of being me is possible. AND, I want to love as many of you as you will allow, so consider yourself hugged. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

When I love, think, speak, or do something, I do it with my whole heart. I might think better of something latter and change my thoughts/actions. But at the time, I am simply who I am as I am where I am doing the best I can with what I have. So, if I say I love you in anyway (as a friend, family, other) then I mean exactly that with all my heart. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I am who I am, nothing more and nothing less. I am beginning to grow in ways I would not have been able to dream of even a year ago. Life is such a wonderful adventure even when it hurts the worst. As long as I can still breathe, I want to live, to love, to laugh, and to be "the me-est me I am capable of being." ♥ ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Heart stopped. Frozen tears. A sob stuck forever in lungs. Big eyes. Lips tremble. How many times can a heart stop & restart? Silent plea. Please love me. I am broken beyond repair. Love me. Pummeled pieces sweep clean to make new. Please love me. Hidden. Watching. Scared. Please. A small whimper. Please no more hurt. Just love me. Final words spoken only through big eyes. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A sweet enigma, a puzzle, a smile. Big sad eyes seem to flash a knowing, a flirty impishness, and she is gone but remains here. Catch her if you can. She dances though broken & sings though strangled. Though she was silenced, her heart broke free. Watch her story. Hear her fly. Taste her depths. Smell the abyss, the dawn, a radiance. Feel her pulsation. Reach out to own her, she vanishes as mists in the sun. Just dance. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Bring me not the cut or picked flower if you would show me love. Bring me instead a field of wildly growing flowers to enjoy season to season forever. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Dawn oozes across the mountain, drip by drip between leaves & branches onto leaves, flowers, veggies, all. A stirring among the day creatures as the night creatures dance their sleep dance. The crows caw the time change in the in-between time of bridging all on the magic mountain as we dance life into sunshine hours. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Those quiet hours just before dawn, a haunting, a deceptive stillness, where the silence runs deep beckon me always. A mist, a fog, a drizzle, a chill, the dark. The dark is richly textured silence, visibly felt, deafeningly tasted, a moist dryness vibrantly stealthy, seductively terrifying, but tautly calm. The night, the deep night when I want to wrap you deeply into me then fly forever in the peaceful afterglow. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A field of daisies dancing in the breeze, each one alike but not the same. Dancing freely together. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Spying an unattended cup of coffee, the raccoon climbs on the porch bench, sits comfortably upright, and drinks, savoring each swallow, even giving a contented sigh when finished. Wiping his lips with his paws, he relaxes briefly before climbing off the bench to return to the forest. The man returns & wonders what happened to his coffee. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Speaking the truth even when spoken with kindness, love, patience, gentleness, and compassion does often still get labeled by those who do not want to hear it, who cannot hear it for whatever reason, or who actively opposed its being revealed for vested interests' sake. Truth-speakers are not welcome alive among us. We tend to prefer them long dead so that we can admire them without having to listen to the whole message they died for. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

As a youth, I'd sit on our front porch at twilight to watch the fireflies rise up like a twinkling fairy cloud over the green earth. It was a very magical time of wonder. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Mangled Memories

Hey diddle dee dee the cow jumped over me.

Little Boy Blue ran off with the spoon,

And the dish got mad at the moon.

~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

misc. quotes

Foggy, chilly, spring-y day inspires the various birds to call out their mating songs as winter hides somewhere in the whited depths of the forest. A crow caws. A hawk flies for safety. Snow only dots the mountain now. But, it should still be winter. Perhaps this is only a thaw. Life goes on on the mountain. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The weather is bouncing around many choices lately from foggy & drizzlily to snowy & cold to overcast & chilly. My old bones protest, but my heart loves the view of the changes & the smell of the crisp air. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The sun breaks through the clouds. The crows caw. Silence still fills the chilly mountain air on a spring day that should still be in winter. The day is good for breathing deeply & smiling contently, love flowing through my peaceful heart. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Doing my toes, feet, & legs exercises to magical violin-orchestral music, pretending to be that fairy imp who likes to post on my behalf sometimes... flying with my mind, dancing with my heart, soaring on my magic carpet of my fancy. Come dance with me! What adventures we'll have together. Wheeee! *hug* ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Life sparked me with a hope unquenchable. Love whispered strength to carry onward despite all. My heart believed & demanded everything of me. So, here I am living, loving, believing, & dancing no matter what has come before & despite all that will come ahead. I dance the joy of my soul & sing out my story. It's a love story, you know. Dance with me? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Who will tell my story if I don't live it? Who will hear if I don't speak. Who will know my secrets if I don't share them? Who would even want a peek? And yet my life is my story's telling. My words are merely echoed, refrained. The sparkle of joy I can give you is the spark of love unrestrained. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

You touched me deeply although you didn't know it. Your words & your intent came to my dying heart to give me hope & strength to look up again & to continue on living despite all. Your heart will forever in mine be kept. Nothing I can say or do would be adequate to tell you I love you, so I will live my love for you forever. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Today is my day, so I send love, hugs, kisses, blessings, peace, & joy to everyone. Enjoy your day & coming year. May we always love & be loved in return. May we always dance no matter what. *hug* ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Cold, rainy, overcast day gently soothes me into a contemplative quietness that feels like floating in air or water. Maybe it is how dolphins dream of flying or birds of swimming. Listening to the drizzling patterns & smelling the damp chill, my heart sings wordlessly of joys heard only in solemn silence. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Each season has its beauties & challenges, but I was not as aware of the seasonal changes as I am now. My body keeps telling me very loudly when anything changes. ouch! lol ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It's the middle of March, but it feels like early summer instead of the end of winter. The sun is shining brightly. The cat is lounging in the sunny window daring me to put my laptop back on "his" shelf. The dog is guarding me from kamikazi flying insects. oh joy, rapture! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It was a perfectly good tongue, had done nothing wrong... had, in fact, minded its own business just working away in my mouth as I ate my toast. But, I still had to go & bite it. I tried to tell myself this was not going to be fun, but did I listen? NoooOOooOoo. So now my perfectly good tongue is in the tongue recovery room not doing much except hurting & trying to remind me not to do too much with it for a bit. Ouch. Bad pun too. Oh dear. lol ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Laying you down in warm caresses of tender looks, smiles, & kisses, I see your body relax, knowing the fullness of love sends you to sleep as much as watches you through the night. Sleep, my darling. Let nothing trouble you now. Only sleep. Tomorrow is enough for those racing thoughts. Peace be on you & in you now. Only that peace that comes from knowing love. Sleep, my dearest. Sleep. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The chilled fog lingers among the trees just above the mountain. A nip in the air calls me as sobs so deep to be primordial call back when inhaling. No tears. Just a numbed stillness. Peaceful but watchful. Too fey to go or stay. Perhaps the mists themselves are home - that land between. Mystery. Illusion. Alone. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The mists beckon. A fairy waltz just beyond hearing beckons. A longing too deep to name, a movement too instictual to be tamed. My heart waits. My mind says nothing, just watches attentively. The time is not yet. But soon. Soon. The scouts, the watches are always alone, listening, alert, waiting. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw  

Deep calls to deep. Blood calls to blood. Knowing, hearing on many levels always. Mists shroud the forest, my heart. Chilled, bracing, calling, beloved, longing. The Unknown Known. Home yet estranged but not a stranger. Go and stay or stay and go? The calling. Awaiting the calling. But from whom? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Blushing but smiling, she dances the story of Life, of Love to the tabla's beat... her feet, the silver bells tinkle, the bangles on her wrists twinkle like fairy chimes. Her sari, her veil hide as much as reveal the unseen but present, felt ... the song of the river of love & life of which the music tells. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Kebaya covered with embroideries, sarong swishing as she moves carrying a tray of kueh & copi-o, the orang ulu woman has a welcoming smile that hides herself more than any veil could. She is shy, watchful, but friendly. She offers the food again as is custom.. even offers her home for sleep should it be needed. We all smile, slowly we begin talking then laughing. Friends. Family. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Ah the smell of pollen is in the air, the buzz of blood-sucking insects sing out boldly, & all kinds of creepy crawlies are mating & reproducing just as nature intended - by the ga-billions. Spring! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Darkness hovers. Wind thru the restless forest, a sound, a roar in the stillness... imagined? The guts spill out in pain of silent anguish. Tears that never flowed, frozen into sweetness of oleanders, a poison that seeps... despair? Color drained into paleness, a ghostly glow under a hidden moon creeping nearer, strangely welcome, wanted... endless sleep? Gone but remains... forever. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Untamed but broken wild heart observes, watches, waits. Distance, space, seen & observed, observing. Slowly. Slowly. Ever so slowly. Curiosity grows. Slowly wants more. Easily frightened away or will fight if threatened. Wild hearts born to soar on the wind, rejected & die lonely if hunted down in haste. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Daffodils smile while tulips play and crocus & snowdrop dance. Jonquils sway while lilies romp and shamrocks & mayapples swing. Riotous colors & perfuming winds, the lively loveliness of spring. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Running as fast as feet can run, muscles burning, aching, heart breaking, suffocating, trying to catch up. I thought I was loved. I thought I belonged. Surely it was just a mistake to leave me. I don't know how to live on my own out in this wild world. Others try to run me down to hit or kill me. Why was I left? Alone. Left to die. Why? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

If ever you hear a southern woman (USA) say "oh hell no," say your full name, smile, & become very sweetly polite - I will miss you. I also hope your will is finished & your life insurance paid up. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Every fiber of my being, stretching beyond known endurance, strain unbearable, thinking surely the breaking point is well past & yet another breath, another determined gritting, & onward I go. Ever onward. I can do this. I will do this. Just keep going, or rest a bit then continue. Onward. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

As long as there is life, there is hope. Some of the most deeply wounded among us carry that light of hope within them shining brightly even though they themselves may not be aware of their own shining. So, we continue onward, never giving up. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Hot & humid so early in the season seems to be foreboding of scorchers to come. I hope not because I hate competing with mother nature to see who's the hottest gal in town. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The hot, humid, sunny day with the cat basking in the opened window transforms into the hot, humid, bright moonshining night with the cat soaking in the moon beams. Sleeping in so many positions but always knowing he is the king of his window, the cat still pays attention to his human playing on the laptop nearby, listening to soothing music. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

In the chill of the rainy spring morning appearing between bouts of heat & humidity, I contemplate my growing charts, graphs, & my snippets of writings, pieces of my heart, my life. I know I am more than just what the numbers say. More than mere words could ever convey. Could even all the world's words contain & capture a human soul whole? No. Free. My heart will fly free even though my body lies captured, imprisoned for a season in my bed. There is no shackles that can hold a spirit's shine this side of death, & even death cannot extinguish love. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Cold rain sprayed in onto my sleeping face, waking me to a chill that meant easier breathing & more painful joints. Low pressure systems do that, & this one had been lingering for a few days. Breathing is my addiction, so the chill despite agony is accepted with a crooked smile & a heart longing to be fully grateful. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Open hand, open heart, & open mind are my way of holding friends' hearts, of allowing who/what is in my life to be exactly who/what he/she is, enjoying what is instead of trying to force what isn't, & even allowing free movement in & out of my life as needed. Of course, allowing anyone loved to leave hurts. Grief is real. But, I have found the grief of force or of pretend to be even harder to bear. The joy of seeing a return is worth every tear. May the best of hearts return many times into my life. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Silences in conversations are welcome little rests in the music of sharing hearts. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

The sun shines diffusely through the cloudy sky as phlox scents the forest's edge. The cat sleeps lazily in the cool spring air in the window. The dog listens to the various small forest creatures & birds, thinking fun times are to be had outside on the mountain. Me? I am enjoying the thoughts for further writing, listening to my normal wide variety of music & lovely offerings of friends online. Ah, sweet contentment, feeling loved. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

It's those why questions that seem to get to me fastest because they seem so important albeit usually unanswerable & more like a spinning of wheels in the mud. A waste of time? Not exactly. But not always as productive or as efficient a use of time as I'd like. And still I ask why. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Quiet solitude with loved ones, human & non-human, nearby is my nature. My soul must listen to the wind, talk to the trees, sing with the water, & slide on playful sunbeams. I must hear the whispers of the clouds, the song of the groundhog, & the gleeful shouts of the chipmunks. I will dance with the forest & make love to the creek. I will lie down on the mountain & contentedly sleep. Stars shine on me & keep my loved ones safe. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Fierce, fiesty, sad, knowing eyes, she looks piercingly through all before her as she lifts her scarved head, straightens her shoulders covered with the crocheted fringed embroidered shawl, & dances her broken, aging body to the pathos in life that knows no surrender, no defeat, no matter what. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw