misc quotes

I am trying my best to help be a platform for healing as well as a light shining on the heinous, evil crimes perpetrated by sexualized violence, esp. of our most vulnerable. It is part of why I am more & more vocal/writing about these topics. Too many of us of all genders, all parts of our world... have been destroyed or nearly so. Enough! Healing & protection for the wounded & the defenseless now! I may not be able to do much, but I can be me as I am, tell my story in my way in my time, write, & be a presence that is not easily forgotten. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

How does someone become so evil or so hated even among evil persons?

They fished then pulled his body from the Ohio River. His hands were chained behind his back & chained not just to his waist but also to his neck & ankles. His feet were chained to concrete block booties. His body, which was left identifiable amazingly all considered, sustained several gunshot, dozens of stabbing, & repeated bludgeoning episodes. The official cause of death was suicide by jumping from the bridge into the Ohio. The various officials & even underworld bosses joked that it was a very dedicated suicide. Decades later those still alive to remember, still are happy he is gone by dedicated suicide.

Still... how does anyone become so vile that even evil doers revile the person? This man was truly evil, no mistake there. But, how did he get that way? Are some horrors best left a mystery? Or, are some extreme horrors a necessity to look at straight in the eye & be vanquished? Are there even answers to these kinds of questions? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Pushed into the fiery furnace to be smelted away into oblivion for the pleasure & entertainment of the overseers, the watchers, the gatekeepers, the caregivers, most disappeared into the forever of death, insanity, addictions, or other evils of the manglers of the young, the defenseless. Traps, snares, lures, chains, prison doors, tortures & sadism now & in the life to come thundered down. Crushed. Destroyed. Lives, Minds, Hearts, Souls. Imprisoned. But the few found a door, a window, a key, a song. Some dared to dance in the flames. To fly up as phoenixes with fire in their beings. No matter how many fires. No matter how much hotter the blaze. Watch them dance on the volcanic eruptions of fire hurled atop them. They dare to smile, to laugh, to sing. They dance. Oh but they dance! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Did you know that I visit your profile often just to send you a kiss, a blessing, & to say a silent prayer for you & your loved one's safety? Did you know that I care deeply for you even if I have said few words to you here? My quiet presence is pretty much all I have to offer. I am only Daphne, not more nor less, but I am here, playfully watching, waiting, wishing you well. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Does my dance tingle you, vibrate you, bring alive parts or the whole of you that you forgot or wish always forgotten? Does my shimmy arouse, inspire, intoxicate deep inside you until even your skin ripples to a beat not heard by ears? Do you long, yearn, ache for more of the dance you believe is not in you? But, the response to my dance is your dance. Did you not know how wonderfully you move to the invisible beat of hearts? ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A fox ran across the ramp this morning while Luna dog & I watched her. She stopped briefly to look at us through the French door windows. She seemed to smile. Oddly, Luna did not bark & insist on getting out to chase her. Then I saw why. She was pregnant. I automatically prayed for her safety & wondered at it all. I had so many questions, but the one right then was how to make sure she had plenty of food & shelter. She ran into the thicker part of the forest nearest the house. It was a great choice, I thought & smiled. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I remember making little satchels of pretty flowers - dandelions, clover, violets, whatever I could easily find & pick in the grass & hedgerows - to surprise various women in my neighborhood (Granny, Mom, neighbors...) esp. on 1 May. I spent a lot of time choosing the arrangements, too. I was pre-school & wanted to "give flower rainbow smiles" of love & magic. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I'm learning to take as much time as I need to process my emotional reactions to something before actually responding - esp. when the other person is trying to coerce or manipulate me to answer within that person's time frame only. I have a long way to go, of course. I react badly to manipulation, coercion, aggression... I have a long way to go in taming my own tendencies toward the same. But, I am making progress... slowly. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

When I'd be scolded for fantasizing by (usually religious) people, those same people would demand that I tell them what evil things I was fantasizing about. Every time the fantasy was about kindness - to me & to the world. I was told I was a liar because all fantasies were sexual. I thought I must be extremely broken, a defective human, & a failure at life because my fantasies were about playful joy & kindness but not sexual. Well, ok, to be more honest, some of my fantasies were about quantum physics, space travel, fairy realms, & exploration adventures... but still not sexual. Where did I go wrong?! ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Leave the past behind, live in the now, move forward not backward, or any variation on this tune can be abusive, traumatic, evil, a lie, or merely unhelpful instead of a feel good truism depending on the situation. Simple slogans, if taken only as just that - a simple slogan, can be helpful if held lightly with a good mix of many other simple slogans of seemingly contradictory meanings, with an open mind, and with a a lot of down-to-earth practical horse sense. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

What do I do with "that which has no name?" Many areas of trouble within & without me are annoyances that cannot be resolved until I can get some idea of what I am dealing with, but these insights elude my grasp. If the annoyance is more than a vagueness somewhere, then I can work around it like I do to solve puzzles - one piece at a time until a pattern begins to emerge. Otherwise, I have learned to sit with the problem, observe, & either work on whatever comes to me or allow it to sit percolating while I do something else. Inspiration & even resolution can come suddenly from some of the oddest times & places. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Sometimes I want to be closer to you, but I just don't know how to be. Sometimes I fear you might think of more than I am willing & able to offer & not understand how exhausted even small things can make me. But, that does not stop my heart from wishing I knew you better. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I wish I were beautiful & held in high esteem wherever I went. I wish I were beautiful & desired as chosen & prized when plans are made for buildings, access, & accommodation. I wish I were beautiful & treated with kindness & respect wherever I went or stayed. I wish I were beautiful & celebrated for my character, my mind, my various abilities or budding abilities, & my heart. I wish my beauty were not tied to my size, my color, my race, my gender, or my any other physical only characteristic. I wish I were beautiful & never had to discover that I was left out of something by so-called friends/loved ones because they felt ashamed to be seen with me. I wish I were beautiful, and I am. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

"Fake it until you make it" is another of those supposed truisms I wish came with warning labels & a detailed instruction manual, but would anyone read those anyway? I would have preferred the wording "Practice healthy behaviors until those behaviors are real in you." Not as catchy or sing-songy, I know. And then someone would have to explain what are unhealthy & what are healthy behaviors then show why it is needful. That would lead to looking at a whole bunch of ugly things we humans prefer to hide away & forbid anyone looking at even if that shame is killing us & our future generations. And so, I write even when it is painful & risky to expose myself - even just to me - because I sense deeply there is a joy set before me & for our world if I/we can endure the pain of healing. I'm told this is courageous, & I guess it is. Mostly I think it is just one of those "doing what has to be done" parts of growing up & being a mature person. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Life is the dance, the art, & the poetry. Let's sing among the gardens of our minds & hearts. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

A voice. Even just to be seen, to have my existence validated in a positive way. My authentic self had to hide deeply to keep from being utterly & completely destroyed. It is almost impossible to survive against all odds and to grow, to re-wire, to heal, to learn, to do much of anything at the same time. Survival trumps all. Finding & then understanding the real me has taken decades of hard work on top of all that. And, I am still in process. But, sometimes the real me pops out to play before slipping back into a safer place to rest & re-group. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Listen & watch: the trees dance & sing, clapping their hands in joy. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

As I've said many times before: Ruling the planet would be a piece of cake if you didn't have to deal with the humans. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

I am singing & dancing on just heartwaves by my own determination despite all. I might be on my back, in a bad way, in a dump, or any number of other outer circumstances, BUT that's only on the outside. Inside me is an eternal singing & dancing, a heart that refuses to kept down & out. You might see tears & sadness in my eyes, but look deeper. Much deeper. See that twinkle? That's my singing & dancing, truest self. Watch closely lest you miss seeing an arabesque or a shimmy, a pirouette or a jeté, or simply my own undulating joy just to be. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Love, compassion, kindness, loving encouragement & support, tender words, a hug & a kiss on the top of the head of the forehead - even virtual ones count, a feeling of safety & belonging alongside freedom & liberty to be... all these applied by us to ourselves & then outwardly to others - human & non-human - heals deeply, allows us to show our real self - sometimes for the 1st time even to ourselves, & to grow/dance/sing/explore. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

When a whole extended family system as well as the community/ies supporting them keeps adding daily to the pile of lies, abuse, &/or other dysfunctions with no change perhaps for generations, the task for individual trying to break free is beyond daunting. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Everyone knows something that I/we don't know & has a perspective I/we do not have. My/our world & vision grows, deepens, & expands as I/we share respectfully. I need & treasure you, my friends. You teach me so much & help me understand things I could never do without you. Thank you. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw